Seven films to reach climax on the day of female orgasm

("Dirty Old Town")

# I found my love

# by the gas works wall,

# dreamed a dream

# by the old channel,

# I kissed my girl

# by the factory wall,

# dirty old town,

# dirty old town.

# I heard a siren

# from the docks,

# saw a train set the night on fire,

# I smelled the spring on the smoky wind.

# Dirty old town,

# dirty old town.

# Clouds are drifting# across the moon,

# cats are prowling

# on their beat,

# spring's a girl

#in a street at night.

# Dirty old town,

# dirty old town... #

(Whistle of "Dirty Old Town")

("Dirty Old Town")

(End of music)

That's it, love. It's deep enough.

Wait, wait.

We didn't fire him properly.

Don't look at me like that, Kat.

Light the candles yourself.

So the little Sausage will have a good reincarnation.

Om...

Om...

(CLEARS HALF) Om...

Om...Om...

# Protect and guide small Chorizo

# on your trip. #

Keep him away from fear

and free him so he doesn't cling to this life.

# "Namaste". #

(SINGS IN ANOTHER LANGUAGE) Please...

Her spirit...

has risen.

Sausage!

(EXCITED) How nice!

It's here.

My love.

Oh, don't cry. Kiss Me.

Kiss.

Kiss.Kiss. Be quiet.

Kiss.

(LAUGHS)

What, what are you going to do?

What are you doing?

Now who's the...? What are you going to do?

You know what I'm going to do.

But your mother...we're in her garden.

Yes.

Next to a dead cat.

Keep talking.

Not so brave anymore, huh? No.

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

Fuck...

Love, just one night. One night.

One night and then, if you want her to go away,

we can call, see if...

Wow. I don't know who would want him, but he's an interesting guest.

"Straight" women, ruled out. What a guy!

Do you remember what he did to Matilda? The mother who gave birth to him.

The problem is, if he stays one night, he's going to stay

the two weeks and that would be...

Hey, hey, hey.

Sausage? Are you okay? Uh huh.

It'll be sad not to see him when we get to the ship,

but we can have another cat.

Okay. We went from cat

Why have another cat, right?

A dog? I love them.

A goat? We can milk her.Done. Chickens?

What?

That look again. You see it?

That "I'm supposed to know what you're thinking" look.

but I don't know what it is.” What? Tell me. Please.

Really?

Well, maybe I'm not very clear. I don't know. It's about what...

No. I know you know exactly what I think.

Okay, we don't have to buy another animal.

Oh no, I don't want to buy anything.

It's not that. Have you seen what my mother has done for our cat?

Don't see. Yes. It's been...

Have you seen how crazy this woman gets?

He's a genius. Make you say “om”.

Getting you to say “om”.

Say it.

No.

She is unique, an incredible woman. One of a kind.

And the thing is, I...

I want my kids to meet this woman.

I want my kids to know her, and when I tell them about her

Know what this “crazy wonder” is like.

So...?

Uh...what...?

We've had this conversation many times before.

Yes.

Fuck.

(Train passing)

(LAUGHS AND SCREAMS) Ah!

You're an asshole.

Asshole.

(LAUGHS)

Tell Ian that's backwards.

It gets like this. With plants inside, it gets.

It's just getting more hipster

and the idea, right?, to attract more customers.

What the fuck is this? An ashtray.

Okay, but it also doubles as an ashtray

if you put it with a plant and turn it off. I do it at home.

No. I talk to plants,

but they die because I put out the cigarettes.

I think it works. It looks rustic.

Yes.London Rustique.

A child with his mouth open also works,

but it's not an ashtray.

No...fucking, I've missed you. (laughs)

But this, man, is so ugly.

I mean, I have to tell you. It's very ugly.

It's like... what is it? As? Because?

Very good. It's like a "parking" of a pussy, right?

Like... there. "Please, please, put it there."

But do you agree with this? Sure, obviously.

Ah.With blind people.

(LAUGHS)

But where do you get these women from?

Well, from ONCE. Let's see, well, seven of...

Are they blind? Sure.

Perfect. Obviously.

This is braille.

Braille for everything.

I missed you too. I missed you.

Ah, what's funnier than a dead child?

What? A dead kid dressed as a clown.

(LAUGHS) Damn!

(LAUGHS) It's good.(LAUGHS) It's very...

Fuck. (laughs)

Fuck. Damn. (LAUGHS)

Do you like my hat? Ta!

And this one, do you like it?

Hey!

Huh? That? Hey?

Hi Roger.

Oh! (laughs)

Much better.

Damn, how beautiful you are!

Ball.

What is this?

Let's see.

It's... It's a mustache. (LAUGHS)

Oh. You don't like it?

I don't understand what it is. Come on.

Is it a mustache or a beard? It's weird. What's that?

It's horrible. Shut up.

Come here. say you like it Say it! Let me go.

Yeah, yeah, I like it! Head banging!

Oh, sorry. Phew.

I can't imagine what it would be like to be your girlfriend.

Neither you nor anyone. I'll kill you.

Do you want something to eat? English food? No, thanks.

(LAUGHS)

So what? Aren't you going to eat for two weeks?

It's possible.

How about some Scotch eggs? You like them, I know.

Because they are Scottish, not English.

You're going to be a very difficult guest. (LAUGHS)

Don't worry about me. Hey...

Tomorrow I'll look for a hostel.

What do you say? You stay here with us.

Okay, okay.

Calm down. We'll see.

I brought you a birthday present.

Oh, cool. I'll open one, okay?

Yeah. Yeah, drink my birthday present.

(LAUGHS) I'll buy you another present.

Where's the...? Easy. Needless. Have...

I'm tired.

To toast. A little. Is very good.

Honey, it's great. It's very good, this wine.

Yes. Honey, it's very good.

It's duty free. From “dutifrí”. Do you know him?

It is a region, a small town in the north of Spain.

(LAUGHS LOUDLY)

(SINGS DRUNK LOUDLY IN A SHOUT)

(Song by Chavela Vargas)

Come on, man.

(laughs)

Honey, darling. That?

(BOTH LAUGH)

What are you drinking?

Come, my love. What song were you singing?

What is it? Good night, my love.

Whiskey.

But what does he sing about? Because you couldn't understand anything.

It is not understood. It's not understood.

It's another language. Ethyl language. I don't speak another language.

I should understand. I'm talking...

I don't know why you don't understand me if I'm talking...

Say “green.” Say “blue”. Goblin!

Say... No... I said it.

(Inner Circle, "Sweat")

Yeah! Yeah!

Yeah! Yeah...

I was afraid of it.

# Standing across the room I saw you smile.

# Said I wanna talk to you for a little while.

# But before I make my move, my emotions start running wild.

# My tongue gets tired and that's no lie.

# I'm looking in your eyes.

# I'm looking in your big brown eyes.

# And I've got this to say to you.# Hey!

# Girl, I wanna make you sweat.

# Sweat till you can't sweat no more.

# And if you cry out,

# I'm gonna push it some more.

# Girl, I want to make you sweat.

# Sweat till you can't sweat no more.

# And if you cry out,

# I'm gonna push it, push it, push it some more. #

Everywhere! Butterflies!

Oh...I'm going to get some water.

Calm down. I'm here, I'm here. That's it.

This hair, this beautiful hair. This hair.

So.

Are you okay? Yes? Water.

You've got it all in the bucket! Okay...

Yuck. Yeah.

Here, the water.

(GARGLES)

Yeah, like that. Very good.

Yes.

Too much tequila.

Now it smells like tequila.

(GIVES HIM KISSES)

My love, are you okay?

Yes?

Pregnant I would be super sexy.

(LAUGHS) Sure.

She would have huge tits.

My love, I love those tits on you.

They're the perfect size. Look how they fit in my hand.

No, but you know what I would do? What?

I'd let you suck the milk.

Sure. (LAXES)

No? (SLAMS) Ah...

I don't get it. Ah...

Weren't you a pervert? I don't get it.

Yeah, and I am. But, no, to me the pregnant

it's just that they don't turn me on. Zero. Zero. No? Are they sexy to you?

I don't know. I have never fucked a pregnant woman,

but... uh... I don't know. But you would fuck her.

Yeah, sure, yeah. Wow! Do you ask this?

The man who would fuck anything alive with a hole

even if it was u...

Let me. Let me! oh! oh! (YELLS) Oh!

(LAUGHS)

I'm not kidding. I want a son. Honey, we live on a boat.

I know. There are many children who live on boats.

Yes? Have you seen them? No, stay.

Don't go. Are you talking about the guy who has

Two children, a dog and a parrot? Yes.

Where do we put it? Oh, look, in the sink.

Tell me, where would you put it? Here.

Here. But children grow up.

They keep growing. They don't stay small like a little pig.

They are, they are growing. Yes.

Well...what?

We would make it stay small.

They grow up, they have to go to school, study math...

And a bonsai child? They grow up.

I think having a child is narcissistic.

It's like wanting mini-mini versions of your face running around.

He's very narcissistic. It's true.

Is it narcissistic to put someone else's needs first?

Yours? Having a child is selfish.

There is a certain narcissism. I agree.

He's totally selfish, yes. He can't take this.

We have to, fuck...

We have to procreate for the good of humanity.

Humanity is already pulling.

Your vagina doesn't have to make things worse.

No. I assure you.

No. Yes.

Because fucking fundamentalists and homophobes

They also have children. It's true.

Yeah. But why do you say it?

And that's why we have to give birth to tolerant people

and wonderful as we can,

with my vagina, so I can...

That's true....balance.

What the fuck? you are horrible

No. But why are you so afraid? Come. Everything will be fine.

Sure.

Hey, I can't talk about this right now.

You never want to talk about this. You are not right. I don't want to.

No. Well, I do want to talk. I don't want to talk.

I do want to talk about this.

You want us to fight. No, I don't want to fight!

Okay?

The topic here is...

Yes?...if you want

Let's try it out.

Can you imagine we do, love?

Ah... Shall we?

(LAUGH WIRELY) I'd love to see it.

That would be fucking good.Yeah.

Yes. My love.

My love. My love.

Would you do it with him? He could give us the little fish of him.

It's magnificent. Why hadn't that occurred to me? Never. How strong.

Me neither. So...Would you? Would you do it?

Yeah. Yeah! Oh my God!

(Tinbell)

(Tinbell)

Hello. This is spiritual awakening.

Good... morning.

Good...Good...

Ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding...

You have healed from all your past life traumas.

Train bound for Mordor, immediate departure.

(LAUGHS) No, please. For. Stop, my love.

I commend Vishnu and Ganesha and Shakti and Shiva...

Fuck Vishnu, Ganesha. Help you get over your hangover...

May they fill you with happiness on this precious morning.

This beautiful morning.

(LAUGHS LOUDLY) Holy crap.

Fuck.

Stop! Stop! Stop, please, guys!

Holy shit! No no no!

Where's the ibuprofen?

In the medicine cabinet, love.

In the place where all the medicines are kept.

In the medicine cabinet, love. There.Ibuprofen-om.

There.Okay. Okay, okay, okay.

Shit, fuck. Om...

(SINGING) Pissed off lesbian on board.

Everyone on red alert. (LAUGHS)

Let's see, do you have any psychopaths in the family?

Yes, my mother.

Okay.

And also any disease, like diabetes?

No. Have a herpes account? I got a herpes "from the dick."

Love, is this for me? Yes, my love.

It will be “on the dick”.

Yeah, yeah. More questions.

Uh...

Oh, cancer?

Uh...

No. Not yet, not yet.

Very good.

What else? Let's see, twins?

Twins? How twins? Twins.

What if you had twins in the family.

Oh yeah.

Hey. (CLEARS HACK)

We were drunk yesterday, right?

Yeah, we were drunk. I was drunk.

She was drunk.

No? (laughs) So what's going on here?

Well, what happens when you say yes to something.

I don't know what I tell myself when I get drunk.

Hey, now don't fuck with this.

That I... Don't tell me I'm screwing up!

But it's just...

It's just a big jump all of a sudden.

Fuck man, that was a drunken yes.

I get drunk,

a fucking hangover when i wake up

and you're talking about cancer and twins.

Who wants to wake up with cancer and twins? Nobody.

Good name for a pub:“Cancer and Twins”.

That's a horrible name for a pub.

It was a drunken yes, but it was a yes.

People say yes to everything when they get drunk,

That's why he regrets it the next day.

I once let a guy put it in my mouth.

Was that a good idea? I don't think so.

Wow. No, it wasn't. Absolutely.

Hey.

It's crazy.

No, but wait.

Want to talk?

(GASPS)

Swear to me you haven't talked about this before.

I swear. Never?

Never. Well, why play along?

I thought it was a good game.

It's not a game. It's for the rest of your fucking life.

For a life together, like when we were in Barcelona.

I knew you guys had this fucking planned.

But this wasn't planned, idiot!

This is not about you!

Asshole.

Asshole.

Eve?

Eve?

(CRIES)

Hey, hey, hey.

Uh huh.

Uh huh.

Okay.

Will you stop crying...

if we try?

Will you promise me? Enough crying.

Not even with the movies.

Do you promise? You make me so sad.

I've never seen you like this, my love.

Really?

Are you serious? Yes.

Okay. Will you let me cry? No.

A little? Cry with joy? No, no, please. Do not Cry.

Yes. I'm sorry. Don't look. Stop, love, please.

Don't look. (CRIES UNCONSOLEDLY)

Would you like some tea? No. Yeah.

Shall I get you some tea? No, wait.

Are you serious?

Really?

Yes.

Yes.

Stop crying. My love, I have runny nose.

Please stop crying. Okay.

Stop crying, love.

I'll stop. I'll stop. Yes?

I'm asking you please. Yes, I'll stop now.

(LAUGHS)

Can I... can I have your cell phone, please?

Sure. What's up? Do you want to ask Chacho for advice?

Okay.

What would you want my phone for?

(groans)

Shit...

(Blows in sink)

This one leaves our sink in a mess. He'll be doing a handstand.

Fucking shit.

(GASPS)

A little more. One more drop.

That's it.

Give it a tap.

So.

It's weird.

That's it.

Ready? Yes.

Ready.

Okay, come on.

Where are you going? Where are you going? I'm curious.

Curious? Yeah, man! You stay here, man.

Please... Damn no!

I just want to see “the thing” when it happens.

Don't fucking touch my ovaries! Leave right now, please.

Okay, I'm leaving. Go to the supermarket.

Hello.

Will you help me take off my panties?

Always.

Ready? Uh huh.

Oh. Not going well. It is going well. It is going well.

Okay? Yeah? OK yes.

Okay.

(MOANS)

(LAUGHS) Give me one thing...

Yes.

That's it.

"Is he in yet?".Oh...

Kate?

Yeah, it's in!

What now?

Now, Mommy wants an orgasm.

Because it helps...

Helps the cervix absorb the...

the... That.

So that it reaches its destination.

Come on, love.

Fuck it. Yeah, fuck it.

Fuck him.

Fuck him. OK.

Make me run.

Make me run, love.

(gasps, moans)

(groans)

You don't have to send money for the child.

But I want to.

How will you pay for the boat?

I'll sell my grandparents' house and ride...

I'll set something up here.

Is there a problem with me staying or...?

Oh. Any problem? Yes.

No. Let's see, you won't be the legal father, so no...

Yeah, yeah. No. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Well, that wasn't part of the plan. Yeah, yeah.

Hey, did you know that if you didn't rock the ship for two weeks,

they take it away? They leave you homeless. Did you know?

And how do they find out? There are agents who control it.

But honey, they send you a notification first. They warn you.

Yes. Yeah.

What I mean is that it won't be easy. It is a big step.

Eve. I don't want, I don't want... How would she put it?

Disturb. I don't want to bother you.

I get it. Is...

It's important to me

that you agree with... with what I've decided.

Sure.

How about you buy a boat?

Don't go too far, love.

Yeah, that sounds good to me.

Okay.

Love, the Corporal. Oh yeah.

Should I go up the other side?

Come on, esmirriao'!

Shoot! That you can! If she can do it,

You can do it. But she can.

It's just that he's very strong and very sexy.

Look at her. You have to help him. He doesn't know.

Softly, like a woman.

Do you want to do the other one? Thank you very much.

Listen, we should do...

as an initiation ceremony.

I propose that today you empty the shit.

Auntie, you always slip away, my love.

You keep quiet. And how do you do it?

I teach you.

You're going to love this. (laughs)

Shit weighs man! Is this all shit?

Tatan!

Go. Look. Let's see.

You do so.

Yes.

Open this.Open this. Yeah.

Okay.

There.

Ooh! What a scent, Eva's shit!

Wow! I love it, my love! It smells like flowers!

Hmm. She smells like lavender and patchouli.

And it has a note of quinoa.

Our potato is your potato. Would you like one?

Uh, no thanks. No?

Our potato is your potato.

Oh, that's great. Yes, for you.

Free? Yes.

Thanks. You're welcome. All yours.

Have a nice day.

I think I know you.

Old trick! Yeah.

The beauty of cheats is that even if they are cheats, they work.

You're very sure of yourself. Okay.

I believe in magic, you know?

Yeah. Well good luck.

Fuck! Have you hurt yourself?

(BOY) Are you okay? do I help you?

I'm fine. I'm fine.

Very funny. Yes?

You smell like pussy. There was no soap.

Wow. Congratulations, gorgeous.

Thank you. I present to you my mother, Germaine. This is Roger.

Uh oh wow. Hello.

Oh, you're beautiful. Oh.

Yes. You're like an older version of Eva.

But pretty. I mean,

You are both very pretty. The mother and the daughter.

Precious.

Very good. To dinner. Uncle, I told you at 19:00.

I'm already having dinner, so relax.

I'm hungry. Shall I put some wine on you?

No! Oh!

No, not on the sail! I need glasses.

Health. Ah, no... Hey, where...?

That's funny. Happy birthday, daughter.

Salud.Pachamama.

Ooh!

Health.Health.

And... and... and for the newest member of our family.

Yes.

By a handsome young man.

Well...And Spanish.

We still don't know if it will be a boy. I would like a girl.

Ouch!

Oh, okay.

Okay, sorry.

Sorry, I thought I knew the news.

Do you like girls? I like girls.

But, sorry. I shouldn't have said that.

The news? What... what news? Yes, sure, sure. Tell him, tell him

Good news.

Mom,

let's...

have a child.

Let's say we're trying.

Good! (laughs)

My goodness. My goodness. Give me more wine, uncle.

You don't stop drinking.

Oh, baby. Oh, oh, mom.

Oh, baby. Kat. Oh what a joy. Yes.

Oh.

And who, who is going to have it?

I.Ah.

My little...

Not you. You, too. At two. At two o'clock.

I like my vagina. Sorry. I have semen for both of you.

And congratulate him too. Because he will be the father, he is the...

donor.donor?

Uh-huh. Yes, he is helping us. Yes. Of what? semen?

Aha. Aha.

What? I'm a stud.

(KAT AND EVA LAUGH) Yeah. I'm the... Yes. Yes.

Are you going to be the father? Yes.

I wait. Well, Roger won't be living with us.

No, I'm here to put my little fish.

To put your... what?

My... my cum. Ah! Yes sure Yes.

Yes. We will raise the child.

Uh-huh. We have...

a contract.

A contract? Yeah, that's all legal.

Everything is clear. You understand me?

What is clear?

Uh, the kind of...

You better explain it to him. It's, yes, it's a...

It says that we will have custody of the child

and that he'll have the right to see it and all of it.

Yeah. But I would like to know how you feel

giving life to a child that you will not raise.

Wait, Mom, it's not about... No, shut up.

That's a good question.

Well, uh...

I'm glad I could help you and...

I'm glad I did.

Yeah, but how do you feel?

Yes. I'll stay here for the child.

And I'll be a part of her life. I'll adapt.

And our feelings?

Wouldn't it be easier to find an anonymous donor?

For the child, no. I can pay for the clinic.

No way. Yeah. I pay you. There is no...

Really, there's no need.

Nope. Pay me. No, no.

Okay. I won't tell you what to do.

You said it. I'm worried.

No... You guys don't have a stable job.

Oh, Kat works two jobs.

More and more boats to restore. I work and...

Don't get me wrong. I think having kids is wonderful,

that everyone should have them. And I'd love to be a grandmother.

But this is all so complicated.

I have already explained to you that we lived in communes,

in the 70s. Wow.

And I assure you that it wasn't all wearing flowers in your hair and...

Who more who less,

they all had pubic lice.

Crabs. Do you know what they are? Crabs. Everybody had.

It was so gross...

They were jumping from one genital to the other.

And they all scratched and had scabs all over...

It was awful. But what she was saying, what she meant to say is...

that we tried. We tried to change things.

We tried so hard...

But you know? In the end, life is the way it is for a reason.

And families are the way they are for a reason.

With one person it's complicated. With two, too.

But with three people? You're headed for disaster.

You are a generation of fucking hypocrites.

Always the same, remembering what it was like to try to do things,

try to change things. But, in reality,

You realized that you couldn't change anything

and you ended up being some fucking museum directors

or militant in a reformist party

and, of course, you love to explain what Paris was like in 1968,

But I fucking fuck, do you know what the truth is?

You liked to be rebellious,

but you always knew that in the end you would settle.

Total, now, two women can start a family,

but always, whenever we reproduce

exactly how straight guys have always done.

That's what you said, right?

No? Form a good family that earns money

because the most important thing is the fucking pasta in a family.

For this absurd system to generate much more money.

Look, you know what? Fuck it, Germaine.

I'm sorry, love. I love you, I love you very much.

You are an amazing woman. You are like a mother to me.

And I wish I had a mother like that.

But frankly, this is pure hypocrisy.

Kate,

I love you.

Kat, I love you.

Kate.

My love. I love you, mom.

Pachamama.

No, no, no. Don't throw it away. Okay.

We'll clean it up. It doesn't matter. Pachamama.

Pachamama? Yes. For land. All.

I love you.Kat, Pachamama.

Do you have varnish? It's my room.

And the figures.

Uh-huh.

Uh-huh.

Uh-huh.

Uh-huh.

Hey!

Yeah! You already have it! Yeah!

You did it.

One thing, and this is important: you can't let go.

No, now. Don't let go.

It slips out of my hands.

Now I won't let go.

Don't let me go.-No.

Shall we try? Again.

Yes. What happened?-Basic. No?

Basic.-Yes. Already.

Hey, keep rehearsing.

I'm going to... I'll be right back, okay?

Thank you. (WOMAN) You're welcome.

Get out! No, no, no!

Get out! (laughs)

I have to make the bed for my Tuesday lover.

You have to go.

Oh...wow!

Someone woke up.

You're having a hard time. Yeah, sorry.

While I was choking you. You fucking pervert.

And you like it.

No. I'm not into S&M stuff, thanks.

M&M?

Hey, guess what? Your pussy tastes like chocolate.

My pussy tastes like chocolate? Aha.

A little, yes. Ah, let me think.

Where did you get that idea from?

What? Of your pussy

My pussy? Yeah.

I mean, it tastes like chocolate, isn't it because I'm a bit black?

No! Yes!

No! You fucking racist!

Like fucking Hitler! I have a Hitler in bed.

No. You'd better get the hell out of here.

There was a misunderstanding. Come on out.

You have lost all privileges. Get out, get out.

No, no, no. I will not share a bed with a child.

What a pervert.

Me, pervert? Yeah.

Let me go, koala. Let go! oh!

Listen, what do you prefer? Farting?

Farting, farting, right? All day.

But you don't smell the plague. The others do. But you do not. OK?

Or, uh, not farting, but smelling like farts all fucking day.

That's easy! Yes?

Sure. I think so.

I think you'd choose to use shit all day.

Ouch! (LAUGHS) Oh! Are you OK?

Yeah. Poor.

I'm fine. Oh. (laughs)

Careful, careful. I'm careful now. Hello!

Hello. Uh...what's up?

Do you remember? Jinx. Hello.

We met the other day. What?

What?

Shit.

Shit, I forgot. Sorry. Hey...

I'm coming. I'm going right now.

I...Fuck. Excuse me.

Do you want me to go away? Yeah...

(Door opening)

Want to help him? Help what?

Didn't he tell you?

No.

What's wrong? We want to get pregnant.

With...

That's strong!

(PANTS, MOANS)

(PANTS, MOANS)

The guy, how he cums. How strong.

We've gotten used to it.

(BREATHES SHAGGED, PANTS)

Uh...

(Door opening)

I'm sorry.

Hey. I... I didn't know you had it booked.

Hey, you could have let me know.

Yes.

There are still two days left in the cycle. Sorry, no, no...

Yeah, don't apologize.

Sorry. Leave it. I feel stupid.

I'm leaving.

See you later?

Ah, well, you should reserve the material for this project

what's on your hands. Yes, but what if we're going to...

Dinner or lunch, ice cream or...? I don't like ice cream.

Well, chocolate? (LAUGHS)

Has all this bothered you?

No.

No, that's cool.

Enjoy.

Good luck. Bye bye.

Goodbye.

(Molly Drake, "Happiness")

# Happiness is like a bird with twenty wings,

# try to catch him as he flies.

# Happiness is like a bird that only sings

# when his head is in the skies.

# You can try to make him walk beside you,

# you can say the door is open wide

# if you grab him,

# woe beat you... #

(engine noise)

(Train passing)

(CHILD) Mom, you've been a long time. (MOTHER) Come on, let's go home.

Here. Thanks, sweetie.

You're welcome. Compliments for the lady, eh?

She doesn't treat me as well as you do. I wonder why.

I like strong women. Are you homeless or what?

Uh... No.-No. The truth.

Hey.

Didn't you have to leave early today?

No, don't worry. Leave it, I'll do it if you want.

No. Sandra is watching TV.

One of her favorite shows. Go with her.

Not that I'm really looking forward to it. See you tomorrow.

Good night. Good night.

Hey!

(YELLS) Hey!

Santa Claus, come on, wake up and get out.

That the reindeer are tired of waiting for you. Come on, open up!

Uh...

Uh...

(MAN) Eva Carrington? Yes.

Finally. Come with me, please.

Come on.

No. Only two people please.

Come with me.

(DOCTOR) This is a little cold.

Oh.

I'm sorry. Peaceful. That's it.

Is that the echo at eight weeks? Nine weeks.

Okay. We think.

We'll see you soon.

Sometimes when it's so recent

You have to do a vaginal echo to see it in detail.

Look.

Here it is.

She looks like a Jew.

Do you want to hear his heart?

Okay.

(Heartbeat very fast)

(Heartbeat very fast)

(Heartbeat very fast)

(Heartbeat very fast)

Is that the face?

He has a face. (LAUGHS)

She has a face.

(Heartbeat very fast)

Hello.

(Heartbeat very fast)

What? That?

Let's see.

(BOY) It's going to explode.

(Screaming children)

Maria, Eric, shall we play hide-and-seek?-The pirates are coming!

-I'm a pirate!-Run, run!

(shouting and laughter)

Oh, haha. Hey, where were you?

God bless you. Thank you.

Save me, sister. All well blessed.

Please. I have sin.

Oh, sinner, sinner, sinner. Forgiven.

Where's Farid? Is he around here?

-Hello. "C'est moi".

Great.

I thought there was a nun contest.

I'm a Muslim.Mua.

Wow, a Muslim who drinks wine. Very good.

Oh. Is this the wifi antenna?

Ha ha. I am a unicorn. Ah!

Asshole. Will you fill it for me, honey?

Yes. Let's see...

And the protagonist?

See the monster? The one in the dinosaur costume?

There. Come. It can't be.

Yes.

(AT A TIME)

Eva had already told me. My love.

Yes? Will you come with me?

Hey, I'm going to pee. I'll be right back.

After the cake we grab and go.

I don't want to stay. Okay? - Yes. OK. Don't worry.

Can I have more, please?

Yes. Let's see. So.

Much better.

Aren't you going to pee?

You know? It's like he needs me for everything.

(LAUGHS) Are you telling me or are you telling me?

Martin won't even brush his teeth without me.

Don't fucking overdo it, I'm right in the back.

I know where you are.-Don't go too far.

-Don't take it like that.

Oh, a building game.

(Shouting)

Should I help you build something?

Do you want to go with the other kids?

Go.

Don't worry, sweetie.

At this age they don't have mania. They are absolutely clear.

It's pretty, huh? It is a good gift.

Hey, I'll take it inside, huh?

Eve!

Come, come.

Kids! Come. Come with me.

Let's see, let's see.

We're jungle animals, okay?

Oh, who's the monkey?

Who's the monkey? Me!

You? Let's see, do the monkey. Uh, uh, uh!

Have a banana.

Like a monkey, huh?

Ooh, oh, oh, oh.

Amazing! And weird. And now...(GIRL) Me! A frog!

A frog! I love frogs! Come on, do it.

Croak, croak, croak.

Eva will play the lion, she replaces me.

Let's see how you do the lion.

(BOY) He doesn't look like a lion. (HOARS)

(GIRL) It looks like a pig.

Animals, does it look like a lion?

(CHILDREN) No, no. What's up?

You do it. You do it.

(ROARS IN THE FULL LUNG)Scary!

(GASPS)

Look. This one is cheaper. Look. Yeah, 800 pounds.

Yes, but it's cheaper. Very good.

And look, it transforms. It is modular.

You continue to use it as the child grows.

And ends up becoming a Prius?

Yeah, it's expensive, yeah.

Hello, can I help you with something?Hello.

Hi.No.

We're just looking. Yeah.

Yeah. They're watching.

Yeah, looking. We might like something vintage style better.

Vintage? Uh huh.

Yeah. Is it the first time they come? Aha.

Yeah. Yes. I know it's a bit cramped for couples

First time seeing such expensive prices, but...

No, but...that's what we're here for.

We...To make it a little easier.

We are not...There is no more secret

to plan and want the best for your child.

(EVA AND ROGER) Uh huh.-Would your wife have planned it?

Oh my husband

He's the family planner.

Fantastic. He's the secretary of the Ministry

of Infrastructures of Spain.

Yes.

I'm a planner extraordinaire.

I'm not missing anything.

Perfect. Well, I would advise you to start

for a slightly smaller model. Great.

We have everything you need.

And... to... to change him... to change his diaper...

Yes? Hey...

we can do as...

like a... table, but hang it fixed on the wall

and like a bar, that moves. Like a folding table?

That's right. And so you will have more space. It is true.

Yeah, and...good idea.

And here... Right? But this...

Or we can put it up here. We don't need that.

We put it here.No, I... No.

Yeah, we took all this shit down.

Okay. And... Oh!

We can sell all of this.

Yes. We will sell it.

and we'll win something. Exactly, yes.

New life. Space.

The piano. We can remove the piano.

Out. We don't need it.

You need it because you have...

You have to teach... the child to play the piano, to play.

No... Yeah, well, whenever... Yeah, sure, please.

I hope we live in a...

Touch.

Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.Knock.

They say it's good for... for the child.

Let's see.

Yes?

I don't know...

I'll play my favorite song in the world.

Wow. Good.

Yes? Yes.

(Piano, "Oh, Susannah")

Not bad.

# Don't cry for me anymore...

# With my banjo for you. #

Very good. Yes.

Now it's your turn.

Yes, tap and I'll follow you.No. I don't know how to play. I don't know.

We can play... uh...

Play and I'll join you. I get it.

Intuitive melody. You with me.

Okay. Four hands.

Four hands, two heads...yes. OK.

Four feet. (LAUGHS)

And a drink.

Okay. Come on.

(piano note)

(piano chord)

(four hand piano chords)

(Piano chords)

(Piano notes)

(piano music)

(music stops)

(Piano chords)

I think you should go.

Where?

To your house, to Barcelona.

No.

No.

But... why?

Uh...

Roger, today was perfect. Yes.

It's been wonderful. Yeah, and fun.

Very funny. It's exactly what I want.

So...? I want him with Kat.

But she doesn't want it.

I'm sorry, but...

She doesn't want it.

Yeah, but if you're here, he doesn't have to try.

(low piano note)

It's not fair. No, I know, but...

It's complicated, you know? No.

It's very... It's... It's not.

It's not complicated. Yes it is.

It's a battle, it's a long battle that has been going on for years.

And I'm so close, so close, Roger. I'm almost there.

Yeah. I have a feeling

that Kat could...Uh-huh.

...evolve. Yes, yes. Of course, of course.

But if you're here... Sure.

...you don't need to be responsible. That's clear.

You needed me for the wanks,

and now: "I'm pregnant. Please go away."

I don't paint anything anymore. It's like that, isn't it? No.

That's not what I'm saying. Yeah.

That's right.

No, that's not what I'm saying, really.

Look. I... I... I want to have this child.

He's... He's my son too, and I fucking want him.

No, but you're not the father.

It wasn't about you being.

Yeah.

You needed me to convince Kat, didn't you, and now she's here.

Sorry.

(WHISPERS) Are you awake?

No, I'm sleeping.

She had a lot of work to do.

Did you see the message? Uh huh.

Ian wasn't feeling well.

The jerk...

I'm so glad you care so much

for the feelings and health of your boss.

What's this about?

Where have you been?

Over there.

You could have warned, right?

What's wrong with you?

I'm leaving Barcelona.

How are you going to Barcelona?

But... why?

So, you're going to go away and leave me with the brown?

The brown one or the boy?

The brown one or the boy?

Or will you name him Brown?

You're going to be a mother, do you understand? And you're going to...

Do you understand that or not?

You're going to be a mother.

Are you listening to me? Do you understand or not?

You don't get it.

You don't deserve it, you don't deserve to be a mother, you know?

Look at my face, I'm talking to you.

Look me in the fucking face!

Look me in the fucking face and leave the wood is fucking shitty!

What are you doing? Hey! But what are you doing?

I've been working all fucking day! Stop it!

Get into the water for him! Stop!

You drop. Holy shit! Let me go!

(footsteps approaching)

(GASPS) Oh, love.

Love. Love love.

Oh.

Are you okay?

Are you okay?

(GASPS)

How was it?

I've had losses.

I'm sorry.

Sorry I wasn't here.

Oh.

When will you be able to leave? I'll take you home.

I want to take you to...No results

to find out if my uterus is okay and I'll be able to leave.

Did they tell you if everything is okay? Did they tell you anything?

Why don't you ask?

Okay.

Need anything else? A tea?

No? OK.

Can I stay here with you?

Come on, love, come on in. It's cold.

(Door opening)

(HIGH VOICE) Hello, my name is Harry.

I'm the selfish son.

Hey... Don't feel responsible.

It's not your fault, you hear? It's not your fault.

It's... his fault.

How? (HIGH VOICE) It's your fault.

Mine?(HIGH VOICE) Yeah!

Fucking asshole, whole fucking asshole, yeah!

(GROWLS) Did you see him?

It's awful.

Can you imagine if it was... a girl?

Poor girl! With his hairy eyebrows.

Ooh! No, thanks.

I don't want to have this ridiculous father.

Oh man.

Or whatever.

It's better not to have been born.

The truth,

I want to found...

the International Association of Unborn Babies. You drink!

There's a funny point.

Would you like a whiskey?

Shall I get you something?

Should I make you some tea or...?

I don't know what to do.

Please say something, anything, please.

My love?

I... We want to help you.

Tell us whatever you want. What do you want, love?

I want you to be sad.

I'm sad.

I'm drinking whiskey at noon. I'm sad.

I'm sorry this happened to you, love, I'm so sorry.

There it is, it didn't happen to me...

but to us.

I didn't mean that.

Please don't misrepresent it. I didn't mean it like that. Wanted to...

We can try again.

Poor Roger.

Hey, hey, hey, please don't be like that. I want to help you, so...

Anything you need,

you... tell me, and I'll go and do it, okay?

What do you want?

Tell me. What love?

What do you need?

Hey.

What? I need to break up with you.

What?

What the hell are you coming up with? What do you say? We cannot separate.

You screwed up.

Nope. But... But... what do you say?

Fuck, it's our life, and these things happen, but...

I'll help you. We want different things,

and you don't get it.

You don't get it. Yeah, yeah.

And I'm so sorry.

We can work it out, whatever, really. Hey.

You tell me what I have to do.

Tell me what to do, and I'll do it.

And I will. I'm...

sick of telling you.

But what do you say? Will you leave home?

I have never felt so alone as in the last few months.

I'm so sorry you felt so alone.

I'll help you. I'll fix it. I'll fix whatever it takes, and...

Let me go.

Wait, love. Where are you going? But what happens?

I won't let you go.

You won't leave. Do you hear me?

Can you hear me?

That's crazy. It's... crazy.

You're a wreck and...you have to let me go.

You're so sensitive...You have to let me go.

You don't think clearly.

Shut up! Let me go, dammit!

Okay. I did not mean that.

Sorry, sorry. Sorry.

My love...

I want to ask you to be honest with yourself.

Yeah, okay.

Extremely honest. Yes.

And tell me if deep down...

You didn't want what happened to happen.

There's nothing more to say. Don't go, love, please.

Love, don't go, please.

My love.

(Knock on the door)

(Door opening)

Everything okay, sweetie?

Yes. It seems weird to me...

Go back to my room with all my stuff.

I thought I might paint it.

Paint it? Yeah.

The whole house needs a coat of paint.

How long has it been since you painted?

I've seen a lot of things that need to be fixed.

There are knobs that are about to fall off and...

the garden is...

I could...

You?

We'll pick the colors together.

Sorry.

And in the afternoons, we can... I don't know,

go to art shows or to the theater.

I haven't been to the theater in ages.

My daughter.

You can stay as long as you want,

but you can't stay to live. I'm not staying to live.

Of course you don't stay.

That's what I said,

and for that... I'll help you put the books back in the boxes,

where they need to be.

And the room, free of books.

"Book free". That sounds really bad. (laughs)

There. I mean...

that you're kicking me out.

No, I'm not kicking you out. But I think it's a bit depressing.

For a girl your age to live at her mother's house.

Depressing for you.

Well, yeah, things haven't turned out the way I expected.

No, things haven't turned out the way I expected.

I didn't expect to have you here. (laughs)

The problem inherent in expectations.

You taught me. Do you remember?

# I have black eyes.

# Who wants to buy them for me?

# I sell them for sorcerers,

# because I have been underpaid.

# Black eyes, treacherous,

# why are you looking at me like that?

# So happy for others

# and so sad to me.

# I would like you more,

# I love you more,

# that I spend every night

# pining for your love.

# I would like you more,

# I love you more,

# that I spend every night... #

What's wrong with you?# ...pining for your love. #

It's just... I miss Chorizo.

(LAUGHS)

Don't laugh, man.

Do you miss Chorizo?

Yes. Yes?

It's just that when we bought the new piano...

Yeah? To...

She was playing with me, man.

He'd get up and...

Yeah....and went out the window.

But don't cry. Was he a piano cat?

Yes? He thought he was retarded. He was very...

Yeah, but that's why I loved him, man.

(MOCKING) "Because he was like me, man." Chorizo!

Let's see. He played so well... Like this.

He would ride with me.

# I had a kitten

# who couldn't swim.

# But since I was late,

# was thrown into the channel.

# Ouch...

# my Chorizo.

# Subnormal sausage.

# That every night he pissed...

# behind the couch.

# Oh, my Chorizo. #

Okay, that's it. Enough.

# Subnormal sausage. #That's it.

That's it, that's it.That's it, that's it. That's it.

That's it, that's it.It's done. It's done, it's done.

That's it, that's it.

Now let's get out of the house,

or we'll die of disgust. I don't want to.

Listen to me.

And off we go... Listen to me.

We're going to a salsa club. No, salsa? Sauce, no, man.

Oh, no, no. Sauce, no. Sauce, no.

No sauce. Don't laugh.

Forgive me.

Chorizo ​​really liked the sauce. It's true. Sorry.

I'm going crazy. That's it. Let's go out. He liked all music.

All the music. But listen to me, we're leaving.

Let's get out of here and we're going to hook up.

You haven't left the ship for ages, huh?

You mean "fuck". Yes, that's right, fuck.

Do you want me to steal all your girls again?

Oh, less, less, you lack practice.

Come on. Yeah?

Get dressed up masculine and we'll go.

On the couch? (GIRL) I'm not sure.

(GIRL) I do. It's so funny.

-I don't know...-Make up your mind.

Me the brunette and you with the nice one.No.

Yeah.-Let's wait and see how it goes.

Sorry, you want to exclude me.

I just don't... I don't want to.

Oh. Do you live here? -How strong.

What is it, are you very poor or what?

(ROGER AND KAT) (LAUGHS)-Amazing!

Come on, shall we?

For you.

Whiskey for the ladies? (BOTH) Yeah!

-Perfect.

Oh, thanks. Oh, you're welcome.

Oh.

Please.

She doesn't need that much room. She has a small ass.

Do you have it small? Tiny.

No, it's not that tiny. But small, how?

It's... flat. Don't know. Does not exist.

Come on. Raise. I want to see it.

Show it.No.

Come on.-I want to see your ass.

Show him. Okay.

Let's see if it's true. Okay.

See? Tiny. Does not exist.

You can't see it in jeans. There's nothing.

Let him take them off.

-Oh, it's like a little extension of the back. (laughs)

-Okay.-Captain Flat Ass.

I do have a nice ass.

I think men's butts are ridiculous.

Why? Because it doesn't make sense

into a male physique, you know? I don't know...

In women, the ass makes sense.

We are all curves, it is one more, but...

It never occurred to me...men...

they're completely flat, and... plup!

What an absurd theory. Yes. It's like a giant pimple.

I've never thought about that before, but you're right.

(GIRLS) (LAUGHS)

(BLONDE) You have a nice ass. Thank you.

And I'm not afraid to say it. Thank you. (laughs)

Thanks. You're welcome.

That's hilarious...You have a beautiful ass too.

Are you okay? Yeah.

You're not the first to tell me. Yeah!

We all have good...

Wow....butts, yeah.

Yeah. Hi.

What was your name? Christine.

Yeah, I know, I know. And you...?

I was asking the last name, sorry. Come.

Oh. Christine Smith. Smith?

Yeah. Chris...

Oh. Suzy...

No, uh... Stay here.

Yeah, relax. Okay.

Okay. Do you like it?

Yeah, I like it. Do you like the collar?

I like it. Is it real? No, please!

No.No, I'm a great lover

of animals. Me too.

Yes? I love animals.

Really? Are you a vegetarian? vegan?

Of course. Yes?

I have to go to the bathroom.

I feel...Me too.

You're... a very sexy secretary.

You have a beautiful face to paint...

to paint it. Oh, yeah? Thank you.

Yes. Are you also an artist or...?

No. I am, I am... I am...

professional cartoonist.

Really? And firefighter.

Wow. Yeah.

So you rescue people

of burning buildings? Yeah.

And I draw the people I rescue, you know?

How? Do you draw those who...? How strong!

Do you draw people who are burned?

No, no, no, no.

I'll be out right away.Okay. Very good.

You can go see the rest of the ship.

Wow.

Hello.Hello.

Come. Hey...

You're beautiful.

In the sink...

Uh...

Have you...?

Oh. I just wanted to pee, but I felt like it.

I know. Uh... It's just... What?

Well, nothing, nothing. Uh...did it smell bad?

Nope. Hey...

It's just...

It's very intimate and...ah.

We're about to fuck,

and you go out... having them shit in your sink is very intimate?

Come. Come here. I'm sorry, it's just...

I'm not used to it.

(soft music)

What are you doing here?

Hello.

How do you know where I live?

Oh. I thought you would be with your mother.

And...

Why don't you reply to my messages?

Uh...

I asked you to give me time.

It's... been six months.

I told you I'd call you when I could.

Okay.

I'm leaving now.

No, while you're here...

up.

Do you want a drink?

Nope. Needless. Thank you.

(Tap open)

(Tap closed)

That's great.

When did you settle in?

A few weeks ago.

What do you want?

Ah... Well, Roger is leaving.

To Barcelona. Wow.

Yes, and he really wants to see you before he leaves.

Oh.

Yeah.

I didn't know I'd miss him so much.

You could go... to the boat tomorrow.

Look, we're...we're right here in Homerton,

the place from before, and we could go to Chatsworth Market...

Uh... I think I'll... give him a call.

For a coffee before he leaves.

Hey.

Do you notice?

The what?

It doesn't move.

It's solid.

It's a floor with a solid foundation.

We are in...how do you say? How was it?

On dry land.

Earth...

Mainland. (LAUGHS)

Mainland.Mainland.

Yes.

You didn't like living on a boat, did you?

Yes.

Yes.

No... not forever, but...

It's late. I've changed my mind.

I've thought a lot.

I've been thinking a lot and I need to explain it all to you.

I've been wrong many times... It's just...

...and I wanted to explain to you why...

You know? She had not wanted to be a mother.

I didn't have this desire, the desire to be a mother,

and of course, so what exactly does it mean to be a mother?

You know? I just do not know.

I didn't want to stop being the woman I wanted to be, just because I was a mother.

But now, I don't know, it's like...

I don't know, it's just...

I loved living with you, and I...

That's why I didn't want to have a child. That's why.

And... I wanted you to myself.

I wanted to live life only with you.

And now I realize he's so selfish...

And now that we don't live together anymore it's...

It doesn't make sense. Nothing makes sense anymore.

I had it live with you, and now it's...

I miss you, I miss everything we had,

like... your smell,

and also the adventures we lived.

And I think that would be an amazing adventure.

Both together... or all three or all four, if Roger would help us.

I know it will help me at first, because I won't know how to do it, but...

Uh... Sorry, I know... he's not a son to satisfy you.

I want to have it because I want to

share this experience with you,

and...

I guess you think I'm totally crazy.

Uh... But... But I know I won't regret it.

Never.

And I don't know if I'll be a good mother, at first,

but I will learn, I will learn.

We will learn together.

And you'll see, we'll make it.

Okay?

Come.

Are you pregnant?

You alone?

Yes, like the Virgin Mary.

No, I went to a clinic.

You've gone fast.

Yes.

And what did you expect?

Yeah...

We've both become selfish, haven't we?

I don't know.

I have my boat and you have your son.

I have to go. Leave.

(squawking)

Shut up.

What are you doing?

I don't know.

Want to... come on board?

Uh...

I don't know.

What do you want to do?

(LAUGHS)

(LAUGHS)

Well...

(Molly Drake "Love Isn't A Right")